Love: Our Design or Our Choice?

I’m a water sign (Pisces with a Cancer rising and Leo moon) and therefore I’m prone to live the credo of love. That means if there’s no love present, neither am I. This isn’t necessarily even specifically related to romantic relationships. You hear all the time the phrase, “Where’s the love?” If there’s no love to be found, be it for a neighbor, a flowerbed, a job, a general way of looking at life, or even just for the self — I’m out.

It’s not that I’m trying to be a fickle pain in the tuckus who is chasing a glitter-dipped unicorn ridden by Cupid wearing Justin Bieber’s hair. It’s simply that love in its very essence happens to be my operating system and I readily and warmly acknowledge this fact. This, I thought, was a fairly universal trait amongst Humans.

Not so much.

Now, let it be said that Human Beings are built out of Love. The very Spiritual Physics that hold our souls together, the “glue”, the particle matter of the ethers called Our Essence, is made of Love. Not the love that we perceive here on this spinning electromagnet called Earth — a love that is often defined by a wash of chemicals that causes all sorts of amazing physical sensations (which can have one HECK of a nasty withdrawal we call “heartbreak”). I’m referring to a Love that supersedes all precedent for adhesion and acceptance. But I’m getting ahead of myself, so let me back up.

Here’s the deal in Cliff-Notes format because I doubt anyone has the time to sit here and read a War and Peace style expose of the layered dynamics of Spiritual Physics as applied to Love. Even if you had the time, I’d never put even an enemy in such a droll position. So here we go with the cliffy-note version:

Eons ago, Darkness learned that the Chemistry of Love is the most powerful force in the Universe. It realized that in order to gain any foothold in any environment where Love existed, such as our lovely third dimension, It needed to convince anyone who would be designed out of the ingredients of Love that the Love was not real. I mean, c’mon — if I’m carrying a pistol and I’ve been taught that the bullets in my pocket are instead Reese’s Pieces, then that gun is going to be good for nothing but a pencil holder.

So here goes Darkness, convincing every Human Being on the planet that their base design — Love — is not only a myth, but isn’t real anyway. There are many ways in which Darkness has achieved this most fascinating dupe. First and foremost, let’s put some focus on the “Sin” myth that many religions love to beat to death. This modality states that Human Beings are indeed not full of Love, but full of Sin. What’s weird about this statement is that not only is it NOT true, but it’s not even grammatically accurate. “Sin” is a Roman Archery Term. It means to “miss the mark”. So Human Beings are full of Missing The Mark? Sure, I can buy that for a dollar (to quote the original Robo Cop.) But even if we’re full of missing the mark (or Maker’s Mark, depending on who you are), that still doesn’t mention what we’re full OF. It just mentions what we’re prone to doing. So not only has Darkness scored points on getting an entire species to buy into the thought process that we’re not only missing something — but we’re doing so in a way that’s not even grammatically possible. That takes a LOT of generational spiritual mutation. Yet thousands of Human generations later — here we are, hearts and identities all stitched together from leftover ideologies like a demented Frankenstein quilt, believing we were nothing more than scrap patchwork to begin with.

It’s sad.

For those that figured out along the way that being a sin-filled loser was probably not what God had in mind when God created the endlessly creative species called Humanity (in God’s own Impression, nonetheless) — Darkness cooked up Plan B. Plan B is a fascinating cocktail made of pain and disappointment called “Bitterness”. This elixir is especially acidic and will burn like crazy when poured directly on an open wound, particularly one centered in the heart. So folks will lead out in hopeful connection with another and if they experience disappointment in life — whether it be through romance, work, or simply friendship — here comes this dump truck full of toxic Bitterness to be poured all over the gaping open wound of the heart. When Bitterness hits the spirit, it burns into the nature of what we’re made of, causing Spiritual Scar Tissue that toughens the supple surface of our soul. Once toughened, the soul loses some of its sensitivity until the scar tissue sloughs off over time. Time heals, right? Well yes, except for the kicker: Darkness placed within the Elixir of Bitterness an addictive agent that causes the healing soul to crave the burn. Within the Bitterness is an emotional narcotic, an addiction to the pain. As we heal, we begin to crave the burn. So we make sure to order up another dump truck full of the Elixir of Bitterness and scald our soul all over again. This addictive property within the Elixir of Bitterness is one of the reasons that kicking bitterness is more difficult than many physical addictions. It requires a great deal of behavior modification and redirection from the withdrawal symptoms caused by the soul decontaminating as it heals past the damaged tissue. Bitterness is a tough addiction to break but it’s very possible. It just takes a little awareness and a little work.

For those that get a handle on their addiction to Bitterness, realizing along the way that being twisted up by pain like a raging pretzel is likely not the most effective way to muddle though life — Darkness has concocted Plan C: The Illusion of Separation. This puppy is a thorn in the side of most people who have pretty much decided that though they may have a few things to work on, they’re not a patchwork sin quilt, and they’ve also gotten over their bitter period after choking on enough Alanis Morisette to cure anybody. The Illusion of Separation is a toughie to identify because it’s hard to know what’s real or what’s not real when you’re in The Dream. This entire reality is what we dream up day after day. It’s the end result of my dream overlapping with your dream overlapping with his and her dream — if there ever was a quilt, it would be the quilt of dreams that rolls out in this incarnation. We call this quilt of dreams “Reality” — which does not actually exist. “Reality” is simply the agreed upon section of the quilt, or dream, that we decide is the “safe base” in the middle of this endless cycle of creation. Confused? That’s what Darkness is counting on in order to really enact Plan C, or the Illusion of Separation. Plan C gets a little wonky, sort of like trying to decipher a 1099 Tax form as opposed to the insty W-2’s, so Plan C gets two whole paragraphs.

The Illusion of Separation works because we are unclear on what being connected to Source, or God, actually feels like. We’re unclear because we’ve been taught that the bullets in our pocket are Reese’s Pieces. (And no, I’m not trying to equivocate God with gun violence. It’s the most absurdly obvious comparison I can currently muster.) We’re unclear because we’ve been taught an absurd idea of God — some judgy weirdo that lords over everybody like a frat house hazing committee, disqualifying each person on technicalities because they’re not cool enough to get into heaven. That’s not God. That’s a Human personification of God enacted by the a collective part of The Dream that is still trying to get picked for the kickball team, so they’d better create a god that’s petty enough NOT to pick people. That way, when their version of god picks THEM according to their interpretation of “the rules”, they can feel special — just like the dude who gets into Theta Cappa WhoCares after eating a goat turd. Now that’s an accomplishment. (And it looks like Plan C is going to get three paragraphs.)

The Illusion of Separation hinges on the fact that Darkness has worked hard to disrupt our connection with Source, or God. Though it’s outside of Darkness’ ability to ACTUALLY disrupt our connection to Source, or God — or as it’s known, LOVE — it can certainly distract us by pointing us in the direction of our own insecurities long enough to keep us wandering the hallways of our own discontent like some poor mental patient pinging against the asylum walls looking for the bathroom while the Rob Zombie lights flicker overhead.  The Dream has created a “reality” where we’ve forgotten that connection to Source / God / Love is instantaneous. That connection is part of our Fabric of Love, our very Being, our very Spiritual Make-up. It is ignited by the thrill of laughter. It resides in the excitement of a phone call placed by a loved one. It is in the heart-stopping beauty of the light emblazoning a sunrise, or the glowing explosion of clouds burning at sunset. It’s the whisper of peace in the moonlight, the rolling giggle of a child’s abandon, or the touch of a friend. It’s the look in the eyes of someone who truly understands us, even for one moment. It’s the lulling song of the ocean waves that puts us to sleep on the beach. It’s the sound of rain on the roof that reminds us how small and how safe we are at the same time. It’s the massage to the ears as the wind whisks through pine trees and the bodily explosion as we connect with the one that we love enough to build our life with. It is the warmth that grows in our stomach when we give something to someone else and expect nothing in return. It is the smile from a stranger, the compassion given in a moment we don’t expect it, the bloom of a flower, the encouragement in an email. Our connection to LOVE, to God, to Source — is omnipresent. It never ceases. It never wanes. It is in our breathe, our words, our actions. IT IS US.

Yet we are convinced it doesn’t exist. Absolutely convinced. We can’t even identify God / Source. Simply because we have chosen the lesson of separation through the Illusion of the Dream.

There are those who are seeing past this Illusion. Darkness’ dreaded and effective Plan C is coming to a crashing halt. 2014 is the Year of Illumination. This year holds all the spiritual ingredients for each one of use to be known for not only exactly who we are — good, bad, indifferent or ugly — but for each one of us to KNOW our connection to Source / God / Love is REAL. The time for Illusion has passed. The 20th Century was Illusion’s last big heyday. Though Illusion will still be present, and certainly people will still require and even crave its difficult karmic lessons, more and more people everyday are waking from The Dream and realizing that indeed — this life is not the tail that wags the dog, but it is EXACTLY what we make it.

And how thrilling is that?

This means that LOVE finally has its place in the conscious part of our patchwork dream quilt. Finally. It’s somewhat ridiculous to think about — because it would be like saying, “Finally, AIR has a place in our understanding of what keeps us alive!” (No one said Humanity was quick on the draw.) Love — the Spiritual Ingredient not the sensation — is not a choice. It’s a key part of our Design. Just like a chemical building block, an amino acid in a gene sequence, Love is the energetic signature that holds the Human Spirit together. It’s the Spiritual DNA on which everything else we are is built upon — physically, emotionally, intellectually, and of course — spiritually. Love is not optional in our survival, just as air is not optional. Just as water is not optional. We may not like the taste of the tap water but if it’s all we have, then we better dang well drink it, or we’re dead. In the same way, we may not like the idea that we are reliant on Love to live. But without it — we die.

This scenario has been played out with small children in a gruesome way. A phenomenon called Failure to Thrive occurs when a child is not touched and is repeatedly ignored. If never touched, the child will quite literally — die. If that’s not proof enough for anyone that Love is a key component in our design which directly affects our survival, then The Dream has been replaced with The Illusion. And that’s its own living Karmic Hell.

Many who are still addicted to the Illusion of Separation feel the need to categorize the nature of Love in order to control it. Again, this goes back to a last ditch attempt by Darkness to keep Plan C rolling as long as It can until The Year of Illumination kicks it to the curb. We see this futile exercise in controlling Love demonstrated by those who attempt to decide who can get married and who can’t. These folks attempt to dictate that there is some sort of “difference” in heterosexual love and homosexual love. The marriage equality issue is blowing up headlines across the USA as state after state acknowledges the utter ridiculousness in attempting to administrate Love. They may as well administrate who is qualified enough to breathe air. Is there heterosexual air and homosexual air?  I’d like to see who gets appointed to THAT congressional hot-air committee.

Love is not a choice. Who we love is not a choice. What we do about how we feel about someone is most definitely a choice, especially if the love we feel for someone isn’t reciprocated. If we keep hanging in there after we’ve been politely informed that our feelings are not shared, then we become a stalker, and that’s not about love, but about control and desperation. Again, Darkness enacts Plan C in the “name of love”.

Love is our Design. It’s our soul food. It’s our base Spiritual Protein in our Celestial DNA. We can’t even choose NOT to love. It’s simply what we do. Because it’s what we are. We just THINK we’re something else. We agonize in loneliness because we have bought into the Illusion that Love can only be felt through the association with a partner. Surely, Humanity is not designed to be alone. Otherwise, our soul would not have the need for a community-based physical experience where we are born into a body that is grown INSIDE OF SOMEONE ELSE. If our design did not include others, we would simply be an autonomous soul floating individually out in space, learning all there is to learn from the burp of endless Pulsars. Most all of us desire partnership. That, too, is our spiritual design as well as a biological imperative that makes sure that the species continues to propagate.

However, the “agonizing in loneliness” part isn’t necessary, though we all do it at one time or another. It’s how we try on the Illusion of Separation to see if it’s going to work for us. We desperately miss that “connection” with another person and we mistake that for LOVE. Indeed, that connection can BE love. It can also be connection with Self and with Source (through creativity, through helping others, through work, through friendship). Okay, sure, that doesn’t keep a person warm at night — initially. But with a little tweaking of the lense through which we view our life, we begin to see that there is GREAT connection and a feeling of completion in simply being in Peace with our Design.

This is what Buddhists call Nirvana and what Christians call being Filled With The Holy Spirit.

When we agonize in loneliness, we are convinced that we will never have partnership. What causes us agony is not being “lonely” — which is an enormous inconvenience and many times a real and unpleasant chemical reaction in the brain if one is going through a “break up”. The agony of the spirit comes from our buying into the Illusion that we will NEVER have connection. We literally create a future based upon our worst fears, a prison of perceptions, and we live in it. We base this prison off of our past experiences which involve having no one around in a romantic capacity. And instead of shifting our lense and our focus to the rest of our existence, which is ultimately connected in every way — we fixate on the one portion of the painting that is missing the color that is our favorite.

Certainly, nearly every Human Being craves a romantic partner. Again, that’s part of our Design. Some people are blessed with partnership at a young age that lasts until their last breath. Others rack up a lifetime of experiences until that “right person” comes along. Yet how we handle the time in between finding this “just right” individual is up to us. We may agonize through the time under the guise of “never”, or we may enjoy every connection we have with Creation in our unlimited connection to LOVE until this person arrives. How we choose to experience our life is completely up to us.

Love is our Fabric of Being. We don’t need to learn to love. We need to unlearn how to ignore what we are. It’s been ingrained in the Human Species for thousands of years, this disassociation from the Self. Yet we are thawing out, our extremities tingling with sensation once again as our Consciousness and our Collective Spirit thaw from a deep and long winter — which never actually existed.

You are not a choice. You are. Love is not a choice. It is. Be what you are. That’s the way it is.

About danielleegnew

Danielle Egnew is an internationally renowned Psychic and Medium whose extensive appearances in media encompass film and TV (ABC, NBC, USA, TNT), as well as radio and print. Her private practice is based in Los Angeles.
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2 Responses to Love: Our Design or Our Choice?

  1. Teri says:

    Wow! GREAT blog! :)

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